September 8, 2010

"Think of how He has borne with you, and still bears with you, when so much in your life is unworthy of Him and you have so richly deserved rejection. Learn to marvel at His (God's) patience"- J. I Packer

"if He (God) also puts thorns in your bed it is only to awaken you from teh sleep of spiritual death- and to make you rise up to seek His mercy" - Whitefield

August 2, 2010

Thank you, Music.

A few definitions, shall we?
a.  a specific response by the body to a stimulus,as fear or pain, that disturbs or interferes with the normalphysiological equilibrium of an organism
b.physical, mental, or emotional: strain or tension

It greeted me so well today. The morning actually started out great. I had a Skype date with my best friend over coffee, joking and smiling and filling each other in on new things in life, and discussing the old. I love her so much so it was easy to just relax and be at peace, and be filled with joy. Somehow from all of that joy, the day was just dramatically tossed into work, physical, and emotional stress. Don't get me wrong, I don't want stress to sound like the big ugly monster that we all hate, even though most times that's exactly what it is… It was more contemplation. Over-thinking? Perhaps, or finding the significance in things I didn't realize before. It's hard for me to not think in general, and then for my thinking to turn into mind twirls, and riddles... it just blew me up a bit.  

Thank goodness for music though. Funny, how music is able to sort of just calm my nerves. I'm able to sit at a piano, close my eyes and sing words that I've written and have memorized… words that I love to say out loud, so much so that I say them in front of 1,000's of people almost every night, for months at a time. Words that take me to a place, or a smell, or a scene, or a memory that I hold dear, or want to feel and know again. Music is a powerful thing, isn't it? I was thankful to be able to sit and play tonight. To release myself again. I'm aware that I sing to a crowd most nights, but sometimes it's almost like I just sing to myself and hope that people can just feel what I'm feeling. 

A girl can dream. 

By the way, my dream last night was bizarre. I've been having bizarre dreams. Not sure if it's due to sleeping in different beds every night or what, but weird weird dreams. Sometimes I remember them… sometimes I don't.

Home still seems far away. Soon enough though. The travel destinations will be getting better very, very, very soon.
That, is something I am looking forward to :)

July 31, 2010

Date Night

Let's have an update, shall we?

I'm going to aim to become a much better blogger. I'm not sure where the time goes, or if it's just me that's always going. Haven't figured that one out yet.  Whatever the case… guess where i've been hiding? ON TOUR. And loving it. I'm on tour with The Barenaked Ladies; A quad of Canadian gents and it has been a rather amazing time. It's funny how Canadians are truly different than Americans, besides the whole country thing. Their persona, humor, speech… it's interesting to me and I've enjoyed it. 

Travel has been doing its "wearing" thing. We headed out this afternoon to Raleigh, North Carolina and it began to rain. Trust me, I love a great rainy day. The sounds of the drip… drop…drip… drop- I really do love it. I think a rainy day is necessary almost in ones life, every once in a while. I guess its easy for me to say that since i'm a Los Angeles native. Nonetheless, it began to rain and I was getting a bit weary about the show, since it was an outdoor venue. But the evening unfolded into a beautiful one. The show was great too. There was this huge shimmery shiny wall, with a big oak tree on it, massive thing. Really neat. I should've taken a photo. Bleh. Oh, that's right… my nifty new phone has an amazing camera, and on top of that has an amazing application for another camera. I'll totally give you a glimpse at the creations it produces. 

soon soon. 

i want to fly back to Switzerland, asap. 
till next time.

May 23, 2010

Did someone say summertime?


i've been anxiously awaiting summer actually. i really do love the fall and winter. dearly. i spend most of my enjoyment of the year during those months, but for some reason, this summer just seems like it's going to be a beautiful, and breezy one. i'm currently in Texas which hasn't delivered as far as good weather is concerned. Just hot and sticky. Feels like Florida. Boo.

i'm touring with Barenaked Ladies and Kris Allen in July and August and that just sounds fun, and I haven't even started. Bigger venues will be a nice adjustment. I've been waiting for something like this.

Home, (los angeles) is still a bit foreign to me, but I have hope that I'll be there some more in June. Keyword, hope.

Til next time.

February 16, 2010

AIRPORTS are so exhausting. Agree or Disagree? Agree.
have you ever been to the airport where everything just goes wrong? yeah i have. pretty sure the line that Jason and I waited in was a complete and utter joke. BUT as Jason always says " it could always be worse" and he's absolutely right. So i began thinking of ways that I thought would make it totally worse off.

We could've been standing in the line, outside in the freezing blizzard-ing cold.

That sounded pretty terrible to me & that's all that i came up with. Ha..
We're at the airport again, no news there. Headed to Cleveland, OH. And I'm actually quite excited about it. I've only been to OH twice and it was so short. This time, like the other two will also be short but I'm going to try and sink in all that I can about the place. It seems like a sweet state. :) Yeah, i said it.

A good nap will be nice. A nap as in, a full day of rest. And then shopping, and nail salon day.

Wow. I'm such a girl.


Finally I got it posted on my Youtube, so that all you fine people can see it as well :)


February 5, 2010

Sleepless in Seattle

So i've started day the first leg of the promo tour… and i must say, this is going to be extremely enjoyable. I love love love love love Seattle, and all of its yummy coffee and cool sights to see. Sleep was limited, considering the business of my day. I felt more touristy this go 'round, which i don't mind much. Went up to the space needle which i feel like, somewhere in the back of my mind i've always wanted to do that. Accomplished. And visited one of my favorite coffee shops in the states (as a whole) - Cherry Street. LOVE. and have been enjoying my time here. I was thankful for the decent weather too. I even see a peep of sun shining through my window :)

I'm very excited about this little promo tour, and visiting so many amazing cities/state.
Next week: SF, Chicago*, NY, NJ, Boston…

stay tuned. i'm sure a funny story or two, or rad photos will be shown here.

more later.


January 23, 2010

food for thought

i'm so HUNGRY. in in out protein cheeseburger… i say yes.
i haven't really eaten much, and even though you're not supposed to eat after 9, i feel like
you can make an exception. right?

anyways, it's approached me again:
a good read
a lack of understanding
the hope of things working out, that haven't in the past
the joy of living

there's something about meeting someone new for the first time; and getting to know them, or shopping and finding the one thing in the store that you love and there only being one left & its in your size… there's something amazing about that. i hope you're following my train of thought here. i don't ever really know how to feel when i know i could be getting myself into heart troubles. do you, or do you not consider it? do you take the risk and just go with it and hope for the best? i'm so black and white with stuff like that. yes or no.

i hate maybes.

my sister had a pageant today: Miss Ventura County… and she WON! can you believe that? I couldn't. and neither could mom or my sister. It was basically insane. She's going to Miss California sometime in the summer, and she'll have a busy year ahead. crazycrazycrazy. what was crazier was definitely our loud cheering. they all loved it though. support, what's family for?

anyways, food for thought: risking or not.
i guess it's " chill " - i really hate that word.
more later. xoxo

January 18, 2010

stormy weather


i don't know about everyone else, but i'm actually a HUGE fan of rain. i love the cold, and i think its great to be inside with a cup of coffee and snuggled by fire, (or candles) if you live in an apartment like me. I think its great. i went to my psycho trainer, in this stormy weather and to no one's surprise… almost died. the man is a nut (insert serious face). but on a happier note, i just watched Vh1's tough love episode from last night, and again--- PEOPLE are you with me?? this is CRAZINESS. me on Vh1? i dont get it. so surreal. i just don't think its hit me yet. ha..
and the vh1 party at my apartment was a success. i'll post a quick video recap from it. very fun!

the rest of the day looks like:
hot cocoa (perhaps :)
bookstore to read
and tv tonight :) the bachelor comes on.
i know i know, guilty pleasure.

i hope everyone is having a great Monday. they're rare for me, so this is nice.
blessings from God continue to amaze me.


January 15, 2010

because how many times can you watch yourself on tv?

my music video premiere on Vh1. i can't even believe that i'll be on television. i never thought ever ever ever ever ever that this would be happening… at all. i literally remember sitting on my couch watching a 30 second clip of this new you oughta know artist when i was 18 years old and thought to myself " i'll never get there, how could i?" but dying for it. and seriously, here it is. that JUST hit me… that's crazy. blessings blessings. i'm so thankful for this opportunity. anymore than this would send me over the edge and i'd really question my sanity. i hope all of you reading this, will watch it and most importantly enjoy it.

i've got my sister and my mom coming over with a couple of my closest friends. early wake up call,  coffee, breakfast foods and a great couch to sit and watch this all go down. i'm trying not to pee on myself. seriously.

EEEEEEEE!!!!!! :)
ciao ciao

January 13, 2010


I cannot, may i repeat CANNOT believe that i am a vh1 "You Oughta Know" Artist.. I remember getting the news and i about died. seriously. I'm so excited to see where this road takes me, and i'm even more excited to have all of you guys apart of it. I couldn't do it without other people being affected and needing music as much as i do… just for life in general. This whole thing is a little nuts, and i'm just trying to take it stride by stride remembering who I am, where i've been, what i've come out of, and where i'm going. I hope to see it through with more music to keep pushing hope.

its all we've got.
hugs_ kisses.

more soon.